My tailbone/whatever injury is still not better and I'm really upset that it's single-handedly preventing me from playing tennis. I haven't gone one week without making a trip to the tennis courts since June (when I was in Indonesia) and I really hate this, I really hate living life without having tennis to look forward to, I hate this so much, I don't even know what is wrong with me, I don't even know how it freaking happened. I didn't fall, I didn't even feel any pain when I was playing last week, maybe my inability to bend my knees to go for low balls finally paid its price, but I don't think it was that bad. What was that bad? I don't know. I'm really frustrated. I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe this is happening to me. What the fuck.
I honestly, genuinely feel like a part of me has died.