anotherlongshot (anotherlongshot) wrote,
anotherlongshot
anotherlongshot

Quid pro quo.

Andy Murray needs to shut the fuck up.

Federer's number one ranking up for grabs: Andy Murray

CINCINNATI, Aug 18 - Roger Federer's lead at the top of the world rankings is far from insurmountable, number two Andy Murray said on Tuesday.


The Briton, who this week took over second spot from Rafa Nadal, begins the defence of his Cincinnati Masters title on Wednesday, fresh from his triumph at the Montreal Masters last weekend.

Murray (9,250 points) is the first British male to be ranked number two and a good performance this week could help him close the gap on Federer (11,040).

"It (the gap) is not that far," the Scot told reporters. "It's a matter of a couple of matches.

"If I'd had a slightly better run at the Australian Open or instead of losing a tight game to (Andy) Roddick in the semis at Wimbledon, who knows?

"I know it's a long way from losing in the semi-finals to winning but that would have made a huge difference," added Murray. "I would be very close to Roger in the rankings if I had won those two matches from the semis onwards.

"That's really the only difference, getting a slam, between being number one and number two because the consistency in the other tournaments has been pretty similar."

Only three men, Andre Agassi, Patrick Rafter and Roddick, have won in Canada and Cincinnati back-to-back.

Winning 10 matches in two weeks is a tough task but Murray said he was not worried about the risk of overdoing things ahead of the U.S. Open which starts on Aug. 31.

"In the U.S. Open you can play your first round on the Wednesday so you could in theory have nine days in between matches," Murray said.

"Because I took a five-week break after Wimbledon I would hope I would still be reasonably fresh.

"I think it's more mentally than physically that's important, because physically I think I'll be strong enough to compete in the slam," added the Scot.

"You need to go in there mentally fresh. It's a long, stressful couple of weeks if you want to do well. But I am not that fussed about having to play five matches (here). It can get hot here but I guess it's the same for everyone."

1. The "only difference" is getting a Slam? This "only difference" has made Roger #1 again. Oh, and he won two.

2. If I'd studied harder in my first two years of law school, I would've gotten a first class. I didn't study harder. I didn't get a first class. How does that change anything? It doesn't. This fucking retard couldn't even make it past the fucking QUARTER-FINAL in Australia, couldn't win his semi-final match in Wimbledon, and he has the cheek to say such shit. Roger Federer has been winning Slams for six years. SIX FUCKING YEARS. If it's so easy to consistently win Grand Slams, if that's the "only difference" between him and The Man Fed, let's see little Murray try winning a Grand Slam or two.

3. Oh, wait, I forgot - that's not going to happen. The idea of Andy Murray counter-punching his way to the US Open title is enough to make me laugh my ass off.

4. Besides, hasn't he got the memo? The US Open is really the UFO - Undisputed Federer Open.

5. Fucking retard. Shut the hell up.

6. NADAL NEEDS TO COME BACK NOW.

*

In more serious and unhappy news, last night was made of utter fail. And utter shit. Then I emo-ed in front of the TV, half-watching tennis (thank goodness for tennis, seriously), had SMS fight with Tong, cried and barely watched James Blake losing to Igor Kunitsyn, then I slept at 5, and then I woke up at 10ish when my mom yelled at me over a sarcastic SMS I sent her last night, then I got up at 10.30 when I felt guilty about abandoning my mom when I told her I was going out with her a few days ago, then she didn't give a shit which pissed me off so I went back to bed.

Except I didn't really go back to bed. I laid on my bed and cried like a child and my mom came in (bloody hell need to fish out my room key from the bunch of keys they keep in the drawer; bloody ridiculous to have someone unlocking my fucking room door when it's quite clear I don't want to talk to anyone) and basically talked at me while I was too pissed off to say anything.

Story of my life. I came home at 1 a.m. and apparently I'm Cinderella because, yeah, I missed my "curfew". Er, I'm sorry, I didn't know there was one. They asked me why it is that I never tell them what time I'd be home - absolutely laughable question if you want to know the truth. Everytime I tell them I'll be home at 1 .m. or whatever, they're all, "No come back at 11.30."

11.30. Oh my fucking god, you must be fucking kidding me. Even if they say 12, it still elicits the same response from me. In the first fucking place it's a bit ridiculous to dictate the time at which I choose to come home because I'm not fucking 16 anymore. And this whole nonsense is getting out of hand.

The worst part came when my mom went off on some retarded spiel about how I shouldn't stay out late with a guy because I'm a girl. I was all, Um I was out with my boyfriend?

She actually said, That's even worse. Who knows what you're doing with him?

First, even if I were sleeping with him (and not saying I am), who the fuck said two people can only fuck each other at night?

Second, LOL my ass off at her apparently trusting the group of guys known as Guys Who Are Not My Boyfriend more than my boyfriend. For fuck's sake, there is no rule that says people only have sex when they're in a relationship. If the prima facie assumption is that my boyfriend is to be trusted the least, then I seriously...I don't even know. Really, I don't. Because the last I checked, the guy that I choose to date will be a guy who respects my boundaries. He stops when I tell him to. He doesn't make me do anything I don't want to do. If the group of guys known as Guys Who Are Not My Boyfriend are more trustworthy to do the same, then it makes me wonder why I date. It makes me wonder why she's so worried about the fact that my older cousins are not attached. Because apparently a girl's boyfriend cannot be trusted.

WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF BULLSHIT LOGIC IS THAT.

And of course there's this issue of sex. Even if I were sexually active, that is my choice. I wanted to laugh in my fucking sleep when she came in this morning and yelled something about me taking responsibility for my own actions.

I'm sorry, but I'm patently insulted by her suggestion that I'm incapable of doing so. If she'd paid any attention at all, she'd know that I spend my whole fucking life taking responsibility for my own actions. I beat myself up over stupid decisions I made, and the person I lay the most blame on is myself. I am a fucking responsible person (which is also why I deeply resent being forced to go for Professional Responsibility lectures. What the fuck, if I ever run away with my client's money, the entire legal profession can fucking go to hell) and I don't expect other people to clean up my mess. After I do something stupid I wallow in my misery and self-pity for a bit, then I move on with my fucking life. I don't add stupidity atop stupidity by doing retarded things like failing my exams. And I swear, if she has a clue what happened in 2007, she wouldn't be saying such insulting bullshit to me.

I have no interest in talking to someone with respect when the person clearly isn't talking to me with the respect that I deserve. In the first fucking place, I have a law degree which is better than anything anyone in the family can boast of. Normally I don't give a shit, normally I'd shut up about it because it doesn't matter; but it's fucking rich undermining your daughter's intelligence and sense of responsibility when she has a goddamn law degree - one that she didn't think she could finish, and one that ultimately exceeded all expectations. Does an idiot get a 2-1 law degree? Does an irresponsible person finish a fucking degree she didn't want, one that caused her great misery for two years?

And of course, when you take a shit tone with me, I have no interest in being nice. When you want to argue with me, make sure your arguments make sense. Make sure they have a logical basis. Because coming to me with some illogical, nonsensical argument based solely on untenable and ridiculous assertions, assertions which are supported by empirical evidence derived from my grandmother's examples, not only would it piss me off, it would also further diminish whatever little inclination I had to listen to you. Please do not insult me further by advancing ill-informed and badly-structured arguments based on outdated and antiquated notions of gender, and the apparent weaker status of the female in relation to the male. I don't agree with such bullshit, and I'd appreciate it if such nonsense isn't shoved down my throat.

On the one hand, they're proud of my intellectual capacity; on the other, they're surprise when I express strong opinions. Get a fucking clue. I'm not a fucking doormat. I'm not some guy's arm decoration. I have a brain, I have a brain that works, and I have a brain that works better and smarter than most people's. Including their's.

So I guess this whole rant boils down do this: Do I think I'm smarter than my parents? Hell yes I do. And therefore, I won't take this bullshit, and I will not respect their unreasonable and illogical demands if they don't bother to 1) talk to me nicely; 2) talk to me reasonably; 3) argue their case logically; and 4) appreciate the fact that I have spent practically my whole life bending backwards to accommodate their unreasonable requests...oh, wait, sorry, I mean demands.

I can't remember what the hell happened to inspire me to write this entry, but whatever the case, I laugh and cry at the same time in realisation that everything I wrote in there still holds true. Pardon the bad, melodramatic writing though. That embarrasses me.

Also, here's a memo to future parents: If you want a kid that's docile and meek and acquiescing, I suggest you don't send her to law school. In fact, don't send her to school at all. Do an IQ test, and if she's of above-average intelligence, keep her at home! She'll be good and obedient, with no mind of her own, because all she'll grow up with are your ideas, your morals, your principles.

So yeah, I'm sorry I'm educated, I'm sorry I have a brain, I'm sorry I can think. Except I'm not sorry. You don't expect your daughter whom you think is clever to just acquiesce to your bullshit without a second thought - because that's not who I am. I analyse every single fucking thing down to the last detail, not because it's fun, but because it's something I've come to do, be it because of the whatever legal training or otherwise. I don't know. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that I am argumentative (though not necessarily confrontational) and I will not take bullshit from people. No matter who you are. Parents, boyfriend, friend. If you disagree with me, tell me nicely that you disagree or I just wouldn't bother. Because anything more is a waste of my time.

Of course, in my head I make concessions for the fact that they're unaware of some material facts which might change the nature of the game. Even then, talking to me like I'm some idiot when I have proof that I'm not is just...it's incredibly insulting. And it's insulting no matter who's doing the talking. Ultimately it's most insulting when my parents are the ones doing the talking.

I mean really. Be thankful I turned out this way. I hate to say this, but look at the other child in the family. What the fuck are you complaining about then? I love my brother very much, but the things he gets away with, that I don't get away with, are just fucking ridiculous. And my mom insists she doesn't favour him. Please, I'm not an idiot. I genuinely don't care that she does; I just wish she'd stop treating me like a fool.

The reason I haven't started on my dad is because I came home last night to find him gone. My mom then drove out to look for him. I was...I don't know what the hell I was feeling, but I eventually went out to the living room to watch tennis. Dad came back, I asked him twice where my mom was, he ignored me. Okay, whatever, I tried, not my problem if you can't be bothered to reciprocate.

Then the maternal figure came back like ten minutes later. She then started yelling at me and the paternal figure, but more at me than him. Paternal figure muttered something about the car: apparently he doesn't like it when I drive at night because it's dangerous. Which, by the way, is totally news to me. I've been driving at night for HOW long and NOW you tell me this? A bit coincidental that I was going out with my boyfriend.

Whatever. So the whole time maternal figure yelled, paternal one stood there. Then said nothing. Then went back into his room.

Because, you know, I'm a mind reader and I can know exactly what the fuck he's thinking just by being in the same fucking living room as him. Seriously. If they wonder why I'm non-communicative, they just need to look into the fucking mirror.

Maternal figure yelled something about how I was causing tension in the family (i.e. between maternal and paternal figures) because I was home an hour "late".

Pray tell, what other response can I possibly have to that ludicrous charge except to laugh my ass off? Fucking rubbish. What about the flip side: I have been cutting short on all these social engagements - not just dates with my boyfriend - just because they're too paranoid to go to sleep before I reach home. Maybe it's sweet the first few times, but it stops being sweet when I'm fucking 23. With a law degree. May I re-emphasise that point? I have a law degree. And a relatively clean track record. And I'm really too old to stay out until 5 or whatever, so the latest I'll reach home is probably about 2 - which is a fucking shiny example as compared to other people my age.

So yeah, I can't be bothered to "understand" and "put myself in their shoes". I've been doing it for YEARS and I'm sick of it because I'm not afforded the same treatment. I'm sorry, every fucking thing in life is a quid pro quo. If I don't get something in return for every mile I go for you, I will just stop doing it. And I don't even expect anything big. My expectations are pegged at mere acknowledgement and appreciation of the things I do for you. THAT IS FUCKING ALL. And apparently that is too hard.

Apparently, then, there is nothing to talk about anymore, is there? The best part is, last night was the first time in very long time I reached home at 1 (actually, it was 12.50). The previous night I reached home at 11. The night before that I reached home at 12.30. If there's something wrong with me wanting to spend more time with my boyfriend, then maybe I shouldn't date at all, and when I'm 30 and still single, they can sit around and wonder why I can't find anyone, when the truth is, nobody wants to deal with this kind of crap. Nobody can deal with this kind of crap.

Having said that, Tong is amazingly sweet. I don't know what I'd do without him.

*

ANY-FUCKING-WAY, I must really say this: THANK GOD FOR TENNIS. Without tennis I would've died last night. Seriously.

And shit, I was so happy for Lleyton when he came back from a set down to win his first-round Cincy match against Robin Soderling. Oh my gad!!1!11!1!1 When he yelled his trademark "COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!" after he won the second set tie-break I just started laughing. Then "COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" again when he won the match.

GOOD FOR LLEYTON. He's also boring to watch but the commentators were so right when they went on and on about how he's a competitor and digs deep to win matches. Doesn't always work, but it worked last night. VERY HAPPY FOR HIM.

My other ex-crush, J C Ferrero, lost to Marin Cilic though. Sadness. I think I prefer Lleyton though, for whatever strange reason. I love seeing these old-timers making a comeback, or trying to make a comeback. Good stuff.

Lastly, this totally made me laugh amidst my doom and gloom. From my friend, Mr. Tris X P:


[Twis Pretty Panties]
Mr Sh@nmugam asks, "If a person has worked as a partner in New York in a major American law firm for seven years, do you really want to put him through all these hoops?". Tris asks, "If a person has worked as a partner in NY in a major American law firm for seven years, why would he come back?!?"

I have some things to say about overseas law graduates but I think I'll just shut my mouth about this. For once. Yep.

*

Fucking tired dunno how to play tennis in one hour but will anyway.

Tags: andy murray, angst, family, friends, rant, roger federer, tennis, tris
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