Aaron Tan is too big. This video is epic. "Prease lah", "lan jiao bin", "1 2 3 go in deep throat oh my god it's so shiok".
HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. What a class A loser. What a typical ah beng. How representative of the lower crust of Singapore society. These people exist for my entertainment. I hope he posts more videos like this.
The recent spate of train breakdowns and disruptions has been highly amusing as well. My favourite response by our dear SMRT Corporation is definitely their magnanimous decision not to press charges against the commuter who smashed a train window for ventilation when said train was stuck in an underground tunnel during rush hour. The other contender is SMRT's amazing and totally unopportunistic text message sent to its taxi drivers, alerting them to the "income opportunity" arising from the train breakdowns. SMRT's brilliant explanation - something about an incorrect template, whatever the fuck that means - is almost as good as its generous and big-hearted decision not to press charges for the broken window, but incoherence certainly cannot trump magnanimity. 'Tis is the season of giving, after all.
Seriously though, I'd be more inclined to think that people are overreacting to this series of disruptions if it weren't for the fact that 1) it's a series of disruptions; 2) SMRT keeps raising transport fares without any tangible increase in the quality of its sevice; and 3) after ComfortDelgro bloody raised its stupid taxi fares, I need the damn MRT to work, and so far SMRT isn't delivering.
I'm so thankful that I was stuck in A&E thinking that I was dying when the most serious fault happened - Thursday rush hour, North-South line completely died. I might have been affected - I would've taken the Pasir Ris-bound train from Tanjong Pagar to City Hall for my tennis training, and I might have had suffered a massive heart attack when faced with the crowd at City Hall station. I'm quite relieved that I haven't had to suffer through any train breakdowns so far; I'm already pissed beyond belief on normal days when I'm on the rush hour train and the train stops in the middle of the train tracks for maybe 30 seconds and I'm wondering why the hell isn't it moving, why isn't it moving, why isn't it moving. I can't imagine being stuck in the train with half of Singapore sweating into my personal space without air-conditioning, without ventilation, for an hour. I'd probably sue someone after that kind of ordeal.
I played tennis this morning despite my wayward rib cage. It was more or less okay, except I couldn't serve at all. I tested it out and on my third try, I got myself a REALLY nice ball toss with my left arm straightened above myself - and that was when I felt the pain. It was like something was pulling my rib apart. It was really quite traumatising.
My forehand was still nowhere to be found. My backhand, however, was beyond awesome. My forehand volley is pretty good too and I made one backhand volley winner today - single-handed backhand volley. I just don't intuitively keep both hands on the racquet when I hit a backhand volley. But I can't hold the racquet firmly enough with one hand. I panic whenever the ball goes to my backhand when I'm at the net, but today I managed to reach for it (NUS Wall Guy hit a defensive shot down the line) and put it away. Yayyyy.
Wei Chuen and I attended the first round of the Singapore Women's Tennis Exhibition tournament yesterday, where Flavia Pennetta d. Daniela Hantuchova in 3 sets (who really cares about the score) and Peng Shuai d. Annabel Medina-Garrigues (??) in 2 sets.
1. Dani is even sexier in real life than on TV and in pictures. She looks so much skinnier in real life, but her legs are so long and yummy. Wei Chuen said she's like an antelope - a very apt description. Just look at her:
She looks skinnier in real life.
Now look at her legs:
Yummmmyyyyyy. (I think I'm between 1 and 2 on the Kinsey scale.)
2. Dani was rather cold and unfriendly. She signed a grand total of two autographs. Here's Dani doing press after her match:
3. Flavia Pennetta has sexy legs. She was quite cute during the match, getting worked up when missing shots and returns. It was just an exhibition but she treated it like a normal competitive match, which made me feel better about spending 100 dollars on this. Here's Flavia signing autographs after her match:
4. I was really surprised by Peng Shuai. I didn't think much of her before this because her hairline is weird (seriously, half the reason I watch the WTA is for the hot women and the sexy outfits), but she was serving bombs yesterday. I was very impressed. She also signed a lot of autographs for the (mostly Chinese - as in PRC Chinese) fans and she smiled a lot and seemed like a really sweet girl. I like her now.
5. I hate the retarded and user-unfriendly iPhone camera. The zoom function is so hard to use and the focus is shit in zoom mode. I'm totally bringing my normal camera tomorrow for the final and third-place match.
6. Lastly, a picture of us at the event:
I'm wearing the Tiffany & Co tennis racquets charm that my mom bought me. I love it! I love the guy next to me too. :)