Human Rights exam
MY INTRO SUCKS AND IT'S TOO LONG AND IT'S AS CONFUSED AS MY BRAIN. FUCK THIS SHIT.
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON OVER THERE. TOP SEEDS ARE DROPPING LIKE FLIES. HAS THIS SUDDENLY MORPHED INTO A WTA TOURNAMENT?
This is assuming that he wanted to win the Australian Open final so much that he ended up choking. Also assuming that his recent losses were due to his over-anxiety to win. I may be wrong; unlike tennis commentators, I don't pretend to be a cheap armchair pop psychologist.
But yes. I understand how Roger feels.
I can't write my Human Rights exam because all I can see in my head when I click on my Word document is a B and that freaks me out and almost drives me into Panic Attack mode, and because of that I can't think, my judgment is clouded, I want another A- for the remaining 70% so damn badly that I think I'm choking right now.
Fuck this shit.
I told Simon today that I seem to produce my best work when I'm backed into a corner with nowhere to turn and thus no choice but to come up with some quality stuff under a short amount of time. Having two weeks to do this exam, while seemingly a luxury, is turning out to be a curse. I think maybe I'm starting on the exam too early; maybe I should do it on Friday or something, leaving me with the weekend to write 5000 words.
But I just want to finish this because I want to finish my Land, Law and Development in Asia paper before 25 April because I don't want to still be doing work after the 25th of this month. And so I can't fall asleep at night (though after I fall asleep I don't wake up until like 10 hours later), I wake up every day feeling a huge burden on my shoulders, and at times like these I kind of wish I hadn't taken back the Human Rights assignment 'cause I'd die if I don't get an A for this module. And thoughts like these? Totally unhelpful. They're distracting and counter-productive and I haven't played well with stress and pressure lately, mainly because I haven't felt any, but now...
Kill me NOW.