January 14th, 2016

kiri win

(no subject)

My writing today was pretty much the worst. My head felt heavy, I couldn't focus, and the sentences simply weren't forming or flowing. I was in the Magdalene library at about 11am and I thought maybe it was just the morning syndrome; but it didn't get better at all after lunch. In the end, I gave up at 6pm, and my plan is to send an outline tomorrow along with a more or less written part of my imagined first year paper.

Sometimes I genuinely fear that I'm already losing - or have already lost - interest in this PhD. It was obviously always a too-real possibility considering my habit of getting bored with something really quickly, but I didn't think it would be just after one term! Hopefully, then, it's just the blahness of settling back into Cambridge and having to deal with this abominable cold weather after an awesome month in warm, sunny (and occasionally with torrential rain) Singapore where I felt really loved amongst family and friends.

There is a pain around my left ankle. I'm not sure how it came about. I felt it on Tuesday when walking to the law faculty but I didn't think much of it, assuming it was just a random ache that would go away on its own. I still felt it on Wednesday when I set out to run, which I just realised that I've already mentioned, so the point is this: It is still painful. I related it to Dominic last night at the Punter. Today, he left his cold compress for me in my pigeonhole. Isn't he so nice?

I had dinner at Ramsay today. Oh my god. I didn't feel like going anymore when I saw the menu and discovered that they were serving that really gross cous cous with Moroccan vegetables thing. But I mentioned to Daniel that I was probably going to Ramsay for dinner, and I didn't feel like cooking, and so I went. Alas. Halfway through, I declared, 'I'm never coming here for dinner again.' Dominic sat diagonally opposite me and he laughed. The awfulness of hall food is a running theme in our conversation.

Anyway. I am so tired. I shall watch something on my laptop while I wait for the compress to freeze. It is taking a really long time. I have forgotten how slowly things freeze when I stick them in the freezer. I think it doesn't help too that I initially chucked it in my personal fridge before Dominic ordered me to put it in the freezer, which was an hour ago. Why hasn't it frozen by now?! This is so annoying!