anotherlongshot (anotherlongshot) wrote,

I Hate and I Love

Lovers separate when a catastrophe occurs:
the ground beneath their feet splitting into
two, right down the middle, falling between the
cracks, unable to hold on. A frustrating
event that renders the rest of the

contract unperformable. I suppose there's
nothing else left to say when the
damage cuts so deeply that
a part of me dies whenever I talk to him.
I cry when he hands me back the change.

Ad finem ultimum. What happens when
that has been exhausted too? An implicit
gratuitous promise, its existence overlooked,
when two people get together for an
indefinite period of time. Shocking

oversight. They failed to read the
fine print before signing on the dotted line:
without certainty of term, you don't
have a lease, just an inchoate equity
when one has relied on the other's representation

to her detriment and suffered a loss. The way I'm bound to
you, hands tied behind my back, limboing between
the dark abyss below and the bright
freedom above. I can't switch you off, can't
sever the taut threads of feelings that

continually stitch my skin into yours.
I have missed the sunrise, I have fallen through the
cracks, I don't call him when I get home.
Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris?
Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

February 1, 2007


Catallus 85:
I hate and I love. Why I do this, perhaps you ask?
I do not know not, but I feel it happening, and I am tormented.

Note: The translation here wasn't the one that I originally read when I wrote this but I am too lazy to plug in my external hard drive and dig out the Word document that contains the translation that I did read. It's about there.

Note #2: It just hit me that 2007 was two years ago.

Tags: neb, personal, poems

  • Cambridge Half Marathon 2020: SUB-TWO FUCK YEAH

    On the one hand, I achieved my goal, broke the two-hour barrier. On the other hand, my finish time of 1:56:32 does not reflect the effort that I'd…

  • Harold Pinter's Betrayal; and Charlie Cox!

    Today has been great! One of the best days I've had all year! E and I went to watch Pinter's Betrayal at the Harold Pinter Theatre this afternoon.…

  • (no subject)

    My writing; so lazy! If there were to be one particular cause for the failure that is my life, it would, without a shadow of a doubt, be my laziness;…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.