anotherlongshot (anotherlongshot) wrote,

Some Anguish, Some Pain

Heartbreak does not get easier with experience. Each heartbreak hurts as if it is the first; as if the discrete historical moments of pure anguish never happened; as if I were staring down the end of my first love and relationship, not the 7th (or 8th? I've lost count) one.

The worst part is, he didn't see it coming. Why did I keep silent? Why did he? He felt that there was some distance between us, distance which I perhaps shoved between us on purpose, but he didn't say anything. Why did I not bring up the concerns that I had?

How did it escalate to this? I wanted to talk. Did I want this to end? Was that what I was after? How can I not know? I wanted to talk and I started off wanting to talk but it ended up in this. This - tears, pain, anguish, his heartbreak, our holding on to each other and his whispering, I wish this would never have to end.

How did I not know just how deeply he felt about me?

Why does everything that I touch eventually turn to stone?

I am so tired.
Tags: breaking up, dominic, relationships

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